And then we apologize. This is good! It calls attention to the fact that we know we said something hurtful and we didn't plan it out. It tells the other person - hey I'm sorry I was a jerk just now and can you please forgive me. But the apology is just more words. The sting of what we said hangs in the air.
Sometimes it takes a while for the apology, and sometimes it's instant. But you see the look on the other person's face. They are deflated, and in those horrible rare cases where we really struck a nerve, they look broken. We do this often to the ones we love the most - our spouses, children, best friends, even God.....because they are the ones who ignite the most passion in us.
Oh, friends, we can apologize seventy million times, but we might as well frame those ugly words we said and hang them on the wall. For no matter how many times we say, "I'm sorry," those words will always be there. They can always be looked at in that frame on the wall. Always. You can't take them back.
The Apostle Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians:
"13 Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong. 14 Do everything in love." 1 Corinthians 16: 13-14 NIV
Thinking before we speak is so, so, so hard. I get that. But if this is something we can work on - taking that two second pause before words spill out of our mouths - we can save so much heartache for not only our loved ones, but for ourselves as well.